תמונות בעמוד
PDF
ePub

Yet less our grief, if what remains,
Dear Jacob,' by thy care and pains
Shall be to future times conveyed.
It thus begins:

Here Matthew said,

Alma in verse, in prose the mind,
By Aristotle's pen defined,
Throughout the body squat or tall,
Is, bona fide, all in all.

And yet, slap-dash, is all again
In every sinew, nerve, and vein;

Runs here and there, like Hamlet's ghost;
While everywhere she rules the roast.
This system, Richard, we are told,
The men of Oxford firmly hold.
The Cambridge wits, you know, deny
With ipse dixit to comply.

They say (for in good truth they speak
With small respect of that old Greek),
That, putting all his words together,
"Tis three blue beans in one blue bladder.

Alma, they strenuously maintain,
Sits cock-horse on her throne the brain;
And from that seat of thought dispenses
Her sovereign pleasure to the senses.
Two optic nerves, they say, she ties,
Like spectacles, across the eyes;
By which the spirits bring her word,
Whene'er the balls are fixed or stirred,
How quick at park and play they strike;
The duke they court; the toast they like;
And at St James's turn their grace
From former friends now out of place.

1 Tonson.

[blocks in formation]

Without these aids, to be more serious,
Her power, they hold, had been precarious:
The eyes might have conspired her ruin;
And she not known what they were doing.
Foolish it had been, and unkind,
That they should see, and she be blind.

Wise nature likewise, they suppose,
Has drawn two conduits down our nose;
Could Alma else with judgment tell,
When cabbage stinks, or roses smell!
Or who would ask for her opinion
Between an oyster and an onion!
For from most bodies, Dick, you know,
Some little bits ask leave to flow;
And, as through these canals they roll,
Bring up a sample of the whole;
Like footmen running before coaches,
To tell the inn, what lord approaches.
By nerves about our palate placed,
She likewise judges of the taste:
Else (dismal thought!) our warlike men
Might drink thick port for fine champagne;
And our ill-judging wives and daughters
Mistake small beer for citron waters.

Hence too, that she might better hear,
She sets a drum at either ear;
And, loud or gentle, harsh or sweet,
Are but the larums which they beat.

Last, to enjoy her sense of feeling,
A thing she much delights to deal in,
A thousand little nerves she sends
Quite to our toes' and fingers' ends;
And these in gratitude again
Return their spirits to the brain;

42

50

60

70

In which their figure being printed,
As just before, I think, I hinted,
Alma informed can try the case,

As she had been upon the place.

76

Thus, while the judge gives different journeys To country counsel and attornies,

He on the bench in quiet sits,

Deciding, as they bring their writs.

The Pope thus prays and sleeps at Rome,
And very seldom stirs from home;

Yet, sending forth his holy spies,
And having heard what they advise,
He rules the church's blest dominions,
And sets men's faith by his opinions.

The scholars of the Stagyrite,
Who for the old opinion fight,

Would make their modern friends confess
The difference but from more to less.
The mind, say they, while you sustain
To hold her station in the brain,
You grant, at least, she is extended;
Ergo, the whole dispute is ended.
For till to-morrow should you plead,
From form and structure of the head,
The mind as visibly is seen
Extended through the whole machine.
Why should all honour then be ta'en
From lower parts to load the brain;
When other limbs we plainly see,
Each in his way as brisk as he!
For music, grant the head receives it;

It is the artist's hand that gives it;

And, though the skull may wear the laurel,
The soldier's arm sustains the quarrel.

[ocr errors]

90

100

Besides, the nostrils, ears, and eyes,
Are not his parts, but his allies;

Even what you hear the tongue proclaim
Comes ab origine from them.
What could the head perform alone,
If all their friendly aids were gone!
A foolish figure he must make;
Do nothing else but sleep and ake.

Nor matters it, that you can show
How to the head the spirits go;
Those spirits started from some goal,
Before they through the veins could roll.
Now, we should hold them much to blame,
If they went back, before they came.

If, therefore, as we must suppose,
They came from fingers, and from toes;
Or toes, or fingers, in this case,

Of Num-scull's self should take the place:
Disputing fair, you grant thus much,

That all sensation is but touch.
Dip but your toes into cold water,
Their correspondent teeth will chatter;
And, strike the bottom of your feet,
You set your head into a heat.
The bully beat, and happy lover,
Confess, that feeling lies all over.

Note here, Lucretius dares to teach,
As all our youth may learn from Creech,
That eyes were made, but could not view,
Nor hands embrace, nor feet pursue;
But heedless Nature did produce
The members first, and then the use.
What each must act was yet unknown,
Till all is moved by chance alone.

110

120

130

140

A man first builds a country-seat,
Then finds the walls not good to eat.
Another plants, and wondering sees
Nor books nor medals on his trees.
Yet poet and philosopher

Was he, who durst such whims aver.
Blessed, for his sake, be human reason,
That came at all, though late in season.

But no man sure e'er left his house,
And saddled Ball with thoughts so wild,
To bring a midwife to his spouse,
Before he knew she was with child.
And no man ever reaped his corn,
Or from the oven drew his bread,
Ere hinds and bakers yet were born,

144

150

160

Muse.

That taught them both to sow and knead.
Before they're asked can maids refuse,
Can- -Pray, says Dick, hold in
While you Pindaric truths rehearse,
She hobbles in alternate verse.

your

Verse! Mat replied; is that my care?
Go on, quoth Richard, soft and fair.
This looks, friend Dick, as Nature had
But exercised the salesman's trade;
As if she haply had set down,

And cut out clothes for all the town,

Then sent them out to Monmouth Street,

To try what persons they would fit;
But every free and licensed tailor
Would in this thesis find a failure.

Should whims like these his head perplex,
How could he work for either sex;
His clothes, as atoms might prevail,
Might fit a pismire, or a whale.

170

« הקודםהמשך »