Stew. I am none of thefe, my lord; I befeech your pardon.

Lear. Do you bandy looks with me, you rascal?

Stew. I'll not be ftruck, my lord.
Kent. Nor tript neither, you

Lear. I thank thee, fellow.

I'll love thee.

[Striking him.

base foot-ball player. [Tripping up his heels. Thou ferv'ft me, and

Kent. Come, Sir, arife, away; I'll teach you differences away, away; if you will measure your lubber's length again, tarry again; but away, go to: have you wifdom? fo. [Pufhes the Steward out. Lear. Now, my friendly knave, I thank thee; there's earnest of thy service.

SCENE XIII.

To them, Enter Fool.

Fool.

L

ET me hire him too, here's

my coxcomb.

Giving his cap. how doft thou? Fool. Sirrah, you were beft take my coxcomb. Kent. Why, my boy?

Lear. How now, my pretty knave?

*

Fool. Why? for taking one's part, that is out of favour; nay, as thou canst not fmile as the wind fits, thou'lt catch cold fhortly. There, take my coxcomb; why, this fellow has banifh'd two of his daughters, and did the third a blessing against his will; if thou follow him, thou must needs wear my coxcomb. How now, uncle? would, I had two coxcombs, and two daughters.

Lear. Why, my boy?

Fool. If I give them all my living, I'll keep my

take my coxcomb.] Meaning his Cap, called so, because on the Top of the Fool or Jefter's Cap was fewed a Piece of red Cloth, refembling the Comb of a Cock. The Word, afterwards, ufed, to denote a vain conceited meddling Fellow.

coxcomb

coxcomb myself; there's mine, beg another of thy daughters.

Lear. Take heed, Sirrah, the whip

Fool. Truth's a dog muft to kennel; he must be whipp'd out, when the lady brach may ftand by th' fire and ftink.

Lear. A peftilent gall to me.

Fool. Sirrah, I'll teach thee a fpeech. [To Kent. Lear. Do.

Fool. Mark it, nuncle ;

Have more than thou showeft,
Speak lefs than thou knoweft,
Lend lefs than thou oweft,
Ride more than thou goeft,
Learn more than thou trowest,
Set less than thou throweft,
Leave thy drink and thy whore,
And keep within door,
And thou fhalt have more
Than two tens to a score.

Kent. This is nothing, fool.

Fool. Then it is like the breath of an unfee'd lawyer, you gave me nothing for't; can you make no ufe of nothing, nuncle?

Lear. Why, no, boy; nothing can be made out of nothing.

Fool. Pr'ythee, tell him, so much the rent of his land comes to: he will not believe a fool. [To Kent. Lear. A bitter fool!

Fool. Doft thou know the difference, my boy, between a bitter fool and a sweet one?

Lear. No, lad, teach me.

Fool. That Lord, that counsel'd thee to give away thy Land,

Come, place him here by me! do Thou for him ftand; The fweet and bitter Fool will presently appear, The One in motely here; the Other found out there. Lear. Doft thou call me fool, boy?

Fool.

Fool. All thy other titles thou haft given away; that thou waft born with.

Kent. This is not altogether fool, my lord.'

Fool. No, faith; Lords, and great men will not let me; if I had a monopoly on't, they would have part on't: nay, the Ladies too, they'll not let me have all fool to myself, they'll be fnatching.

Give me an egg, nuncle, and I'll give thee two crowns. Lear. What two crowns fhall they be?

Fool. Why, after I have cut the egg i'th' middle and eat up the meat, the two crowns of the eggi when thou cloveft thy Crown i'th' middle and gav'ft away both parts, thou bor'ft thine afs on thy back o'er the dirt; thou hadft little wit in thy bald crown, when thou gav'ft thy golden one away: if I fpeak like myself in this, let him be whipp'd that first finds it footh.

Fools ne'er had lefs grace
in a year,
For wife men are grown foppish;
And know not how their wits to wear,
Their manners are fo apifh.

[Singing.

Lear. When were you wont to be so full of songs, firrah?

Fool. I have used it, nuncle, e'er fince thou mad'ft thy daughters thy mothers; for when thou gav'st them the rod, and put'ft down thy own breeches,

Then they for fudden joy did weep,
And I for forrow fung;

That fuch a King should play bo-peep,

And go the fools among.

[Singing.

Pr'ythee, nuncle, keep a school-mafter that can teach thy fool to lie; I would fain learn to lie.

Lear. If you lie, firrah, we'll have you whipt. Fool. I marvel, what kin thou and thy daughters are: they'll have me whipt for speaking true, thou'lt

have me whipt for lying; and, fometimes, I am whipt for holding my peace. I had rather be any kind o'thing than a fool, and yet I would not be thee, nuncle; thou haft pared thy wit o'both fides, and left nothing i'th' middle: here comes one o'th' parings.

To them, Enter Gonerill.

Lear. frontlet on? you are too much of late

OW now, daughter, what makes that

ith' frown.

Fool. Thou waft a pretty fellow, when thou hadft no need to care for her frowning; now thou art an O without a figure; I am better than thou art now; I am a fool, thou art nothing.- Yes, forfooth, I will hold my tongue; [To Gonerill.] fo your face bids me, though you fay nothing.

Mum, mum, he that keeps nor cruft nor crum, [Singing. Weary of all, fhall want fome.

Thou art a fheal'd peascod.

[Speaking to Lear. Gon. Not only, Sir, this your all-licens'd fool, But other of your infolent retinue,

Do hourly carp and quarrel, breaking forth
In rank and not to be endured riots.

I thought, by making this well known unto you,
Thave found a fafe redrefs; but now grow fearful,
By what yourself too late have spoke and done,
That you protect this courfe, and put it on
By your allowance; if you fhould, the fault
Would not 'fcape cenfure, nor the redreffes fleep;
Which, in the tender of a wholesome weal,
Might in their working do you that offence,
(Which elfe were fhame,) that then neceffity
Will call discreet proceeding.

Fool. For you know, nuncle,

G.2

The

The hedge-fparrow fed the Cuckoo fo long,
That it had its head bit off by its Young ;

So out went the candle, and we were left darkling.
Lear. Are you our daughter?

Gon. I would, you would make use of your good wisdom,

Whereof I know you are fraught, and put away
Thefe difpofitions, which of late tranfport you
From what you rightly are.

Fool. May not an Afs know when the cart draws the horse? whoop, Jug, I love thee.

Lear. Does any here know me? this is not Lear: Does Lear walk thus ? fpeak thus? where are his eyes? Either his notion weakens, his difcernings

Are lethargied-Ha! waking- 'tis not fo;
Who is it that can tell me who I am?
Lear's fhadow? I would learn; for by the marks
Of fovereignty of knowledge, and of reafon,
I fhould be falfe perfuaded I had daughters.
Your name, fair gentlewoman?—

Gon. This admiration, Sir, is much o'th' favour
Of other your new pranks. I do befeech you,
To understand my purposes aright.

You, as you're old and reverend, fhould be wife.
Here do you keep a hundred Knights and Squires,
Men fo diforder'd, fo debauch'd and bold,
That this our Court, infected with their manners,
Shews like a riotous Inn; Epicurism and luft
Make it more like a tavern or a brothel,
Than a grac'd Palace. Shame itself doth speak
For inftant remedy. Be then defir'd

By her, that else will take the thing she begs,
Of fifty to difquantity your train;

And the remainders, that fhall ftill depend,
To be fuch men as may befort your age,
And know themselves and you.

Lear. Darkness and devils!

Saddle