A staple of romance and lies,
False tears and real perjuries;
Where sighs and looks are bought and sold,
And love is made but to be told;
Where the fat bawd and lavish heir
The spoils of ruin'd beauty share,
And youth, seduc'd from friends and fame,
Must give up age to want and shame.
Let her behold the frantic scene,
The women wretched, false the men;
And when, these certain ills to shun,
She would to thy embraces run,
Receive her with extended arms;
Seem more delighted with her charms;
Wait on her to the Park and play;
Put on good humor, make her gay;
Be to her virtues very kind;
Be to her faults a little blind:
Let all her ways be unconfin'd,
And clap your Padlock-on her mind.
A REASONABLE AFFLICTION. On his death-bed poor Lubin lies, His spouse is in despair: With frequent sobs and mutual cries They both express their care. A diff'rent cause, says Parson Sly, The same effect may give: Poor Lubin fears that he shall die,
His wife that he may live.
FROM her own native France, as old Alison past, She reproach'd English Nell with neglect or with malice,
That the slattern had left, in the hurry and haste, Her lady's complexion and eyebrows at Calais.
HER eyebrow-box one morning lost,
(The best of folks are oft'nest crost)
Sad Helen thus to Jenny said,
(Her careless but afflicted maid)
Put me to bed, then, wretched Jane!
Alas! when shall I rise again?
I can behold no mortal now,
For what's an eye without a brow?
ON THE SAME SUBJECT.
In a dark corner of the house
Poor Helen sits, and sobs, and cries;
She will not see her loving spouse,
Nor her more dear Piquet allies;
Unless she finds her eyebrows,
She'll e'en weep out her eyes.
A staple of romance and lies,
False tears and real perjuries;
Where sighs and looks are bought and sold,
And love is made hut to be told;
Where the fat bawd and lavish heir
The spoils of ruin'd beauty share,
And youth, seduc'd from friends and fame,
Must give up age to want and shame.
Let her behold the frantic scene,
The women wretched, false the men;
And when, these certain ills to shun,
She would to thy embraces run,
Receive her with extended arms;
Seem more delighted with her charms;
Wait on her to the Park and play;
Put on good humor, make her gay;
Be to her virtues very kind;
Be to her faults a little blind:
Let all her ways be unconfin'd,
And clap your Padlock-on her mind.
A REASONABLE AFFLICTION.
On his death-bed poor Lubin lies,
His spouse is in despair:
With frequent sobs and mutual cries
They both express their care.
A diff'rent cause, says Parson Sly,
The same effect may give:
Poor Lubin fears that he shall die,
His wife that he may live.
FROM her own native France, as old Alison past,'
She reproach'd English Nell with neglect or with malice,
That the slattern had left, in the hurry and haste, Her lady's complexion and eyebrows at Calais.
HER eyebrow-box one morning lost,
(The best of folks are oft'nest crost)
Sad Helen thus to Jenny said,
(Her careless but afflicted maid)
Put me to bed, then, wretched Jane!
Alas! when shall I rise again?
I can behold no mortal now,
For what's an eye without a brow?
ON THE SAME SUBJECT.
In a dark corner of the house
Poor Helen sits, and sobs, and cries;
She will not see her loving spouse,
Nor her more dear Piquet allies;
Unless she finds her eyebrows,
She'll e'en weep out her eyes.
ON THE SAME.
HELEN
ELEN was just slipt into bed,
Her eyebrows on the toilette lay,
Away the kittén with them fled,
As fees belonging to her prey.
For this misfortune, careless Jane,
Assure yourself was loudly rated,
And Madam, getting up again,
With her own hand the mouse-trap baited. On little things, as sages write,
Depends our human joy or sorrow;
If we don't catch a mouse to-night,
Alas! no eyebrows for to-morrow.
A TRUE MAID.
No, no! for my virginity,
When I loose that, says Rose, I'll die.
Behind the elms, last night, cry'd Dick,
Rose! were you not extremely sick?
TEN months after Florimel happen'd to wed, And was brought, in a laughable manner, to-bed, She warbled her groans with so charming a voice, That one half of the parish was stunn'd with the poise;
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