TO THE REVEREND MR BLACHFORD,

AT WICKLOW.

SIR,

I BEGGED Some mutton of you, and you put me off with a barrel of ale; these disappointments we must endure. But the main business is, whether it be of your own brewing, and here is another silentium. I knew we must not look a gift horse in the mouth, but ale must look into ours.

There is another point; I would fain know what title you have to send me ale or any thing else, when you hardly ever see the inside of the deanery, or taste my bad wine.

I have had intentions to drink some of your Wicklow ale upon the place, because I fancy it is better where it grows; and in such a case, it will not be improper that the minister should be actually residing.

I shall observe your directions of keeping it, and Mr John Grattan will be delighted with ale strong and stale, or beer stout and clear.

You are a stranger to these proverbs. I am truly obliged to you for remembering me; although it be the duty of you country-folks, as it is of us townfolks, to forget you, and therefore we have a legal title to your presents.

*This letter, with other two to the same gentleman, have now, for the first time, appeared in Swift's correspondence. The Rev. Mr John Blachford, to whom they are addressed, was a prebendary of Wicklow, a clergyman of respectability and talents, and grandfather to the late highly accomplished MrsHenry Tighe, author of Psyche.

However, for once I will break this rule, by assuring you, that I have been, am, and shall be always

Your obedient and obliged servant.

Dublin, April 16, 1731.

TO LADY WORSLEY.*

MADAM,

April 19, 1730.

My Lady Carteret (if you know such a lady) commands me to pursue my own inclination; which is, to honour myself with writing you a letter; and thereby endeavouring to preserve myself in your memory, in spite of an acquaintance of more years than, in regard to my own reputation as a young gentleman, I care to recollect. I forgot whether I had not some reasons to be angry with your ladyship, when I was last in England. I hope to see you very soon the youngest great-grandmother in Europe and fifteen years hence (which I shall have nothing to do with) you will be at the amusement of "Rise up, daughter, &c." You are to answer this letter; and to inform me of your health and humour; and whether you like your daughter better or worse, after having so long conversed with the Irish world, and so little with me. Tell me what are your amusements at present; cards, court, books, visiting, or fondling (I humbly beg your ladyship's

* Frances Lady Worsley, only daughter of Thomas Lord Vis count Weymouth, was the lady of Sir Robert Worsley, Bart, and mother to Lady Carteret.

pardon, but it is between ourselves) your grandchildren? My Lady Carteret has been the best queen we have known in Ireland these many years; yet is she mortally hated by all the young girls, because (and it is your fault) she is handsomer than all of them together. Pray, do not insult poor Ireland on this occasion; for it would have been exactly the same thing in London. And therefore I shall advise the king, when I go next to England, to send no more of her sort (if such another can be found) for fear of turning all his loyal female subjects here against him.

How is our old friend Mrs Barton? * (I forget her new name.) I saw her three years ago, at court, almost dwindled to an echo, and hardly knew her; while your eyes dazzled me as much as when I first met them; which, considering myself, is a greater compliment than you are aware of. I wish you may have grace to find it.

My Lady Carteret has made me a present, which I take to be malicious, with a design to stand in your place. Therefore I would have you to provide against it by another, and something of your own work, as hers is. For you know, I always expect advances and presents from ladies. Neither was I ever deceived in this last article by any of your sex but the queen, whom I taxed three years ago with a present of ten pounds value. Upon taking my leave, she said, "She intended a medal for me, but it was not finished." I afterward sent her, on her own commands, about five and thirty pounds worth

* The niece of Sir Isaac Newton, and married, first, to Colonel Barton, afterwards to Mr Conduit. She is very frequently mentioned in the Journal to Stella.

*

of silk, for herself and the princesses; but never received the medal to this day. Therefore, I will trust your sex no more. You are to present my most humble service to my old friend Sir Robert Worsley. I hope my friend Harry is well, and fattening in the sun, and continuing a bachelor, to enrich the poor Worsley family.

I command you to believe me to be, with the greatest truth and respect, &c.

JON. SWIFT.

FROM LORD BATHURST.

DEAR DEAN,

June 30, 1730.

I RECEIVED a letter from you some time ago which gave me infinite pleasure; and I was going to return you an answer immediately: but when I sat down to write, I found my thoughts rolled upon the trifles, which fill the scene of life in that busy, senseless place, where I then was; † and though I had nothing to do there, at least nothing worth doing, and time lay upon my hands, I was resolved to defer writing to you, till I could clear my head from that rubbish which every one must contract in that place. I cannot but fancy, if one of our heads were dissected after passing a winter's campaign there, it would appear just like a pamphlet shop: you would see a collection of treaties, a bundle of

* This negligence the Dean often alludes to, and never either forgot or forgave.

+ London.-N.

farces, a parcel of encomiums, another of satires speeches, novels, sermons, bawdy songs, addresses, epigrams, proclamations, poems, divinity-lectures, quack-bills, historical accounts, fables, and God knows what.

The moment I got down here, I found myself quite clear from all those affairs: but really, the hurry of business which came upon me after a state of idleness for six months, must excuse me to you. Here I am absolute monarch of a circle of above a mile round, at least one hundred acres of ground, which (to speak in the style of one of your coun.. trymen) is very populous in cattle, fish, and fowl.

To enjoy this power, which I relish extremely, and regulate this dominion, which I prefer to any other, has taken up my time from morning to night. There are Yahoos in the neighbourhood; but having read in history, that the southern part of Britain was long defended against the Picts by a wall, I have fortified my territories all round. That wise people the Chinese, you know, did the same thing to defend themselves against the Tartars. Now I think of it, as this letter is to be sent to you, it will certainly be opened; and I shall have some observations made upon it, because I am within three miles of a certain castle. Therefore I do hereby declare, that nothing herein contained shall extend, or be construed to extend, so far: and farthermore, I think myself in honour bound to acknowledge, that under our present just and prudent ministry, I do not fear the least molestation from that quarter. Neither are the fortifications aforementioned in anywise designed to keep them out; for I am well satisfied they can break through much stronger fences than these, if they should have a mind to it. Observe how naturally power and dominion are attend