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When Venus, loose in all her naked charms,
Met Jove's great daughter clad in shining arms.
The wanton goddess view'd the warlike maid
From head to foot, and tauntingly she said:

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Yield, sister, rival, yield; naked, you see,
I vanquish; guess how potent I should be,
If to the field I came in armour dressed;
Dreadful, like thine, my shield, and terrible my crest! 10
The warrior goddess with disdain replied,

Thy folly, child, is equal to thy pride;
Let a brave enemy for once advise,
And Venus (if 'tis possible) be wise:
Thou to be strong must put off every dress;
Thy only armour is thy nakedness;

And more than once (or thou art much belied)
By Mars himself that armour has been tried.

TO A YOUNG GENTLEMAN IN LOVE.

A TALE.

FROM public noise and factious strife,

From all the busy ills of life,

Take me, my Celia, to thy breast,
And lull my wearied soul to rest;
For ever, in this humble cell,
Let thee and I, my fair one, dwell;
None enter else, but Love, and he
Shall bar the door, and keep the key.

To painted roofs, and shining spires
(Uneasy seats of high desires)
Let the unthinking many crowd,
That dare be covetous and proud:
In golden bondage let them wait,
And barter happiness for state.

F

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But oh! my Celia, when thy swain
Desires to see a court again,

May Heaven around this destined head
The choicest of its curses shed;

To sum up all the rage of Fate,
In the two things I dread and hate;
Mayst thou be false, and I be great!
Thus, on his Celia's panting breast,
Fond Celadon his soul expressed;
While with delight the lovely maid
Received the vows, she thus repaid:

Hope of my age, joy of my youth,
Blest miracle of love and truth,
All that could e'er be counted mine,
My love and life, long since are thine!
A real joy I never knew,

Till I believed thy passion true;
A real grief I ne'er can find,

Till thou provest perjured or unkind.
Contempt, and poverty, and care,

All we abhor, and all we fear,

Blest with thy presence, I can bear.

Through waters, and through flames I'll go,
Sufferer and solace of thy woe:

Trace me some yet unheard-of way,
That I thy ardour may repay;

And make my constant passion known,
By more than woman yet has done.

Had I a wish that did not bear

The stamp and image of my dear,
I'd pierce my heart through every vein,

And die to let it out again.

No; Venus shall my witness be

(If Venus ever loved like me)

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That for one hour I would not quit
My shepherd's arms, and this retreat,
To be the Persian monarch's bride,
Partner of all his power and pride;
Or rule in regal state above,
Mother of gods, and wife of Jove.
O happy these of human race;
But soon, alas! our pleasures pass.
He thanked her on his bended knee;
Then drank a quart of milk and tea;
And leaving her adored embrace,
Hastened to court to beg a place.
While she, his absence to bemoan,
The very moment he was gone,
Called Thyrsis from beneath the bed,
Where all this time he had been hid.

MORAL.

While men have these ambitious fancies,
And wanton wenches read romances,
Our sex will-What?-out with it-lie;
And theirs in equal strains reply.
The moral of the tale I sing

(A posy for a wedding ring)

In this short verse will be confined:
Love is a jest, and vows are wind.

AN ENGLISH PADLOCK.
MISS DANAE, when fair and young,
(As Horace has divinely sung)
Could not be kept from Jove's embrace
By doors of steel, and walls of brass.
The reason of the thing is clear,
Would Jove the naked truth aver:

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That teach one to deny oneself,

Stood unmolested on the shelf.

An untouched Bible graced her toilet:
No fear that thumb of hers should spoil it.
In short, the trade was still the same;

The dame went out, the colonel came.
What's to be done? poor Carvel cried:
Another battery must be tried:
What if to spells I had recourse,
'Tis but to hinder something worse!
The end must justify the means:
He only sins who ill intends:
Since therefore 'tis to combat evil,
'Tis lawful to employ the devil.

Forthwith the devil did appear
(For name him, and he's always near),
Not in the shape in which he plies
At miss's elbow when she lies;
Or stands before the nursery doors,
To take the naughty boy that roars:
But, without saucer-eye or claw,
Like a grave barrister at law.

Hans Carvel, lay aside your grief,

The devil says; I bring relief.
Relief, says Hans, pray let me crave
Your name, Sir,-Satan-Sir, your slave!
I did not look upon your feet;

You'll pardon me:- -Ay, now I see 't:
And pray, Sir, when came you from hell;
Our friends there, did you leave them well!
All well; but pr'ythee, honest Hans,
(Says Satan) leave your complaisance:
The truth is this; I cannot stay

Flaring in sunshine all the day;

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For, entre nous, we hellish sprites
Love more the fresco of the nights;
And oftener our receipts convey
In dreams, than any other way.
I tell you therefore as a friend,

Ere morning dawns, your fears shall end.
Go then this evening, master Carvel,
Lay down

your fowls, and broach your barrel;
Let friends and wine dissolve your care;
Whilst I the great receipt prepare:-
To-night I'll bring it, by my faith;
Believe for once what Satan saith.

Away went Hans: glad? not a little; Obeyed the devil to a tittle;

Invited friends some half a dozen,

The colonel and my lady's cousin.

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The meat was served, the bowls were crowned, Catches were sung, and healths went round; Barbadoes waters for the close;

Till Hans had fairly got his dose.

The colonel toasted to the best;

The dame moved off to be undressed;

The chimes went twelve; the guests withdrew:

But when, or how, Hans hardly knew.

Some modern anecdotes aver,

He nodded in his elbow chair;

From thence was carried off to bed:

John held his heels, and Nan his head.
My lady was disturbed, new sorrow!
Which Hans must answer for to-morrow.

In bed then view this happy pair;
And think how Hymen triumphed there.
Hans fast asleep as soon as laid,

The duty of the night unpaid;

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