HUSBAND AND WIFE.

H.OH. Be full you fenfelefs calf 1

H! with what woes am I oppreft!

What if the gods should make you blest ?
H. Why then I'd fing and laugh:
But if they won't I'll wail and cry;
W. You'll hardly laugh before you die.

THE INCURABLE.

PHILLIS, you boaft of perfect health in vain,
And laugh at those who of their ills complain:

That with a frequent fever Cloe burns,
And Stella's plumpnefs into dropfy turns.
O Phillis, while the patients are nineteen,
Little, alas! are their diftempers feen.
But thou for all thy feeming health art ill,
Beyond thy lover's hopes or Blackmore's skill;
No lenitives can thy disease affuage;

I tell thee 'tis incurable-'tis age.

THE INSATIABLE PRIEST.

UKE Preachill admires what we laymen can mean,

are

He has but three livings and would be a dean;
His wife dy'd this year, he has marry'd his maid.

II.

To fupprefs all his carnal defires in their birth,
At all hours a lufty young huffy is near;

[earth,

And to take off his thoughts from the things of this He can be content with two thousand a-year.

WHEN

DOCTORS DIFFER.

WHEN Willis of Ephraim heard Rocheftert preach,

Thus Bentley faid to him, I pr'ythee dear brother,

* Bishop of Gloucefter.

Atterbury, Bishop of Rochester,

Sz

How lik'st thou this fermon? 'tis out of my reach.
His is one way, faid Willis, and ours is another;
I care not for carping, but this I can tell,
We preach very sadly if he preaches well.

PONTIUS AND PONTIA.

PONTIUS (who loves, you know, a joke

Much better than he loves his life)

Chanc'd th' other morning to provoke
The patience of a well-bred wife.

II.

Talking of you, faid he, my dear,
Two of the greateft wits in Town,
One ask'd if that high furze of hair
Was bona fide all your own.
III.

Her own! moft certain, th' other faid;
For Nan, who knows the thing, will tell ye
The hair was bought, the money paid,
And the receipt was fign'd Ducailly.

IV.

Pontia (that civil prudent the,

Who values wit much less than sense,

And never darts a repartee

But purely in her own defence)

V.

Reply'd, Thefe friends of your's, my dear,

Are giv'n extremely much to fatire;

But pr'ythee, husband, let one hear
Sometimes lefs wit and more good-nature.

VI.

Now I have one unlucky thought

That would have fpoil'd your friend's conceit;
Some hair I have I'm fure unbought,

Pray bring your brother-wits to fee't.

CAUTIOUS ALICE.

So good a wife doth Liffy make

That from all company she flieth ;

12

16

20

24

4

Such virtuous courfes doth she take
That the all evil tongues defieth;
And for her dearest spouse's fake

She with his brethren only lieth.

SA

TRUTH TOLD AT LAST.

AYS Pontius in rage, contradicting his wife, You never yet told me one truth in your life. Vext Pontia no way could this thesis allow,

You're a cuckold, fays fhe; do I tell you truth now? 4

ΑΙΝ

TO DUKE DE NOAILLES.

VAIN the concern which you express,

That uncall'd Alard will poffefs

Your house and coach both day and night,
And that Macbeth was haunted lefs
By Banquo's reftlefs fpright.

With fifteen thousand pounds a year,
Do you complain you cannot bear
An ill you may foon retrieve?
Good Alard, faith, is modefter
By much than you believe.
Lend him but fifty louis d'or,
And you shall never see him more:
Take the advice; probatum est.
Why do the gods indulge our store
But to fecure our reft?

ON A FART,

LET IN THE HOUSE OF COMMONS.

EADER, I was born, and cry'd ;

Like Julius Cæfar's was my death,
Who in the fenate loft his breath.
Much alike entomb'd does lie
The noble Romulus and I :
And when I dy'd, like Flora fair,
I left the commonwealth my heir.

5

10

15

FROM THE GREEK.

REAT Bacchus, born in thunder and in fire,

GREAT

Nourish'd near fhady rills and cooling ftreams,
He to the nymphs avows his am'rous flames.
To all the brethren at the Bell and Vine,
The moral fays, Mix water with your wine.

CARMEN SECULARE.
For the year 1700.

TO THE KING.

Afpice, venturo lætentur ut omnia fæc'lo:
6 mihi tam longe maneat pars ultima vitæ
Spiritus, et quantum fat erit tua dicere fafta!

THY

HY elder look, great Janus, caft Into the long records of ages paft; Review the years in faireft action drest With noted white, fuperior the reft; Æras deriv'd, and chronicles begun

Virg. Ecl.L

From Empires founded, and from battles won:
Show all the fpoils by valiant kings achiev'd,
And groaning nations by their arms reliev'd:
The wounds of patriots in their country's caufe,
And happy pow'r fuftain'd by wholesome laws;
In comely rank call ev'ry merit forth,
Imprint on ev'ry act its standard worth;
The glorious parallels then downward bring
To modern wonders and to Britain's King:
With equal juftice and hiftoric care.

5

10

15

Their laws, their toils, their arms, with his compare;

Confefs the various attributes of Fame

Collected and complete in William's name ;

To all the lift'ning world relate

(As thou doft his story read)

That nothing went before so great,

And nothing greater can fucceed.

II.

Thy native Latium was thy darling care,
Prudent in Peace, and terrible in war;

The boldelt virtues that have govern'd earth
From Lat m's fruitful womb derive their birth;
Then turn to her fair written page,

From dawning childhood to establish'd age,

20