Enter PRUDENCE. Prud. Good-morning, cousin. Who was that speaking so loudly? Snob. Only Jones. Poor fellow, he is so deaf that I suppose he fancies his own voice to be a mere whisper. Prud. Why, I was not aware of this. Is he very deaf? Snob. Deaf as a stone fence. To be sure he does not use an ear-trumpet any more, but one must speak excessively high. Unfortunate, too, for I believe he is in love. Prud. (With some emotion.) In love! with whom? Prud. Oh, no; I haven't the slightest idea. Snob. With yourself! He has been begging me to obtain him an introduction. Prud. Well, I have always thought him a nice-looking young man. I suppose he would hear me if I should say (speaks loudly,) Good-morning, Mr. Jones?" Snob. (Compassionately.) Do you think he would hear that? Prud. Well, then, how would (speaks very loudly,) “Goodmorning, Mr. Jones!" How would that do? Snob. Tush! he would think you were speaking under your breath. Prud. (Almost screaming.) "Good-morning!" But here he comes. Now, do try and make yourself audible. Enter JONES. Snob. (Speaking in a high voice.) Mr. Jones, cousin. Miss Winterbottom, Jones. You will please excuse me for a short time. (He retires, but remains in view.) Jones. (Speaking shrill and loud, and offering some flowers.) Miss, will you accept these flowers? I plucked them from their slumber on the hill. must be that she does Prud. (In an equally high voice.) Really, sir, I—I— Jones. (Aside.) She hesitates. It not hear me. (Increasing his tone.) these flowers-FLOWERS? I plucked them sleeping on the hill-HILL. Miss, will you accept Prud. (Also increasing her tone.) Certainly, Mr. Jones. They are beautiful-BEAU-U-TIFUL. Jones. (Aside.) How she screams in my ear. (Aloud.) Yes, 1 plucked them from their slumber-SLUMBER, on the hill-HILL. Prud. (Aside.) Poor man, what an effort it seems to him to speak. (Aloud.) I perceive you are poetical. Are you fond of poetry? (Aside.) He hesitates. I must speak louder. (In a scream.) Poetry-POETRY-POETRY! Jones. (Aside.) Bless me, the woman would wake the dead! (Aloud.) Yes, Miss, I ad-o-r-e it. Snob. (Solus from behind, rubbing his hands.) Glorious! glorious! I wonder how loud they can scream. Oh, vengeance, thou art sweet! ་ Prud. Can you repeat some poetry-POETRY? You'd scarce expect one of my age-AGE, Prud. (Putting her lips to his ear and shouting.) Bravobravo! Jones. (In the same way.) Thank you! THANK— Prud. (Putting her hands over her ears.) Mercy on us! Do you think I am DEAF, sir? Jones. (Also stopping his ears.) And do you fancy me deaf, Miss? (They now speak in their natural tones.) Prud. Are you not, sir? You surprise me! Jones. No, Miss. I was led to believe that you were deaf. Snobbleton told me so. Prud. Snobbleton! Why he told me that you were deaf. Jones. Confound the fellow! he has been making game of us. THE DRUNKARD'S DREAM.-CHARLES W. DENISON. The drunkard dreamed of his old retreat,- Here's a truce to care, an adieu to pain. Welcome the cup, with its creamy foam! Like a flash, there came to the drunkard's side "Hey, man!" cried the host, "what meaneth this? Is the covey sick? or the dram amiss? Cheer up, my lad! quick the bumper quaff!" The drunkard raised his glass once more, The landlord gasped: "I swear my man, The drunkard woke. His dream was gone; He rose, and that seraph was nigh him still; To dash the cup from the drunkard's hand. YYY BE JUST, AND FEAR NOT-ALFORD. Speak thou the truth! Let others fence Guard thou the fact; though clouds of night Face thou the wind! Though safer seem We were not made to sit and dream; Where God hath set his thorns about, One fragment of his blessed word Is better than the whole, half-heard, And by thine interest turned. Show thou thy light! If conscience gleam, The smallest spark may send his beam Woe, woe to him, on safety bent, Be true to every inmost thought; Hold on, hold on! Thou hast the rock: The first world-tempest's ruthless shock While each wild gust the mist shall clear, And justified at last appear The true, in Him that's true. WARNING TO THE INTEMPERATE.-CHARLES LAMB. The waters have gone over me, but out of its black depths, could I be heard, I would call out to all those who have set a foot in the perilous flood. Could the youth to whom the flavor of the first wine is delicious as the opening scenes of life, or the entering upon some newly discovered paradise, look into my desolation, and be made to understand what a dreary thing it is when he shall feel himself going down a precipice, with open eyes and a passive will; to see his destruction, and have no power to stop it, and yet feel it all the way emanating from himself; to feel that all virtue has left him, and yet not be able to forget the time when it was otherwise; to bear about the piteous spectacle of his own ruin could he see my fevered eyes, feverish with last night's drinking, and feverish looking for to-night's repetition of the folly; could he but feel the body of the death out of which I cry, hourly with feebler outcry,-to be delivered, it were enough to make him dash the sparkling beverage to the earth in all the pride of its mantling temptation. THE LUCKY CALL. A country curate visiting his flock, 66 D'ye think I've turned a Pagan in my age? "Tis in the drawer, be quick, and bring it here." But quick exclaimed, "Dear sir, I'm glad you're come! |