The Lion's Skin too fhort, you know,
(AS PLUTARCH's Morals finely fhow)
Was lengthen'd by the Fox's Tail:
And Art fupplies, where Strength may fail.
Unwilling then in Arms to meet

The Enemy, He could not beat;
He ftrove to lengthen the Campaign,
And fave his Forces by Chicane.

FABIUS, the ROMAN Chief, who thus
By fair Retreat grew MAXIMUS,
Shows us, that all that Warrior can do
With Force inferior, is Cunctando.

One Day then, as the Foe drew near,
With Love, and Joy, and Life, and Dear;
Our Don, who knew this Tittle Tattle
Did, fure as Trumpet, call to Battel;
Thought it extreamly à propos,

To ward against the coming Blow:

To ward: but how? Ay, there's the Question: Fierce the Affault, unarm'd the Baftion.

The Doctor feign'd a ftrange Surprise: He felt her Pulfe: he view'd her Eyes: That beat too fast: These rowl'd too quick: She was, He faid, or would be Sick: He judg'd it abfolutely good,

That She should purge and cleanse her Blood. SPAW Waters for that end were got:

If they past easily or not,

What matters it? the Lady's Feaver
Continu'd violent as ever.

For a Distemper of this Kind,

(BLACKMORE and HANS are of my Mind)

If once it youthful Blood infects,

And chiefly of the Female Sex;

Is fcarce remov'd by Pill or Potion;
What-e'er might be our Doctor's Notion.
One luckless Night then, as in Bed
The Doctor and the Dame were laid;
Again this cruel Feaver came,

High Pulfe, fhort Breath, and Blood in Flame,
What Measures fhall poor PAULO keep
With Madam, in this piteous taking?
She, like MACBETH, has murder'd Sleep,
And won't allow Him Reft, tho' waking.
Sad State of Matters! when We dare
Nor ask for Peace, nor offer War:
Nor LIVY nor COMINES have shown,
What in this Juncture may be done.
GROTIUS might own, that PAULO's Cafe is
Harder, than any which He places
Among his BELLI and his PACIS.

He ftrove, alas! but ftrove in vain,;
By dint of Logic to maintain,
That all the Sex was born to grieve,
Down to her Ladyfhip from Ev E.

He rang'd his Tropes, and preach'd up Patience;
Back'd his Opinion with Quotations,
Divines and Moralifts; and run ye on
Quite thro' from SENECA to BUNYAN.
As much in vain He bid Her try
To fold her Arms, to close her Eye;
Telling Her, Reft would do Her Good;
If any thing in Nature cou'd:

So held the GREEKS quite down from GALEN,
Mafters and Princes of the Calling:

So all our Modern Friends maintain
(Tho' no great GREEKS) in WARWICK-LANE.
Reduce, my Muse, the wand'ring Song:
A Tale fhould never be too long.

The more He talk'd, the more She burn'd,
And figh'd, and toft, and groan'd, and turn'd:
At laft, I wish, faid She, my Dear-
(And whisper'd fomething in his Ear.)
You wish! wifh on, the Doctor cries:
Lord! when will Womankind be wife?
What, in your Waters? are You mad?
Why Poyfon is not half so bad.

I'll do it

But I give You Warning:
You'll die before To-morrow Morning.
Tis kind, my Dear, what You advise;
The Lady with a Sigh replies :

But Life, You know, at best is Pain: ,And Death is what We should disdain. ,So do it therefore, and Adieu:

,For I will die for Love of You!

Let wanton Wives by Death be scar'd: ,But, to my Comfort, I'm prepar'd.

The L A D L E.

HE Scepticks think, 'twas long ago,

TH

Since Gods came down Incognito,

To fee Who were Their Friends or Foes,
And how our Actions fell or rose:

That

That fince They gave Things their Beginning;
And fet this Whirligig a Spinning;
Supine They in their Heav'n remain,
Exempt from Paffion, and from Pain:
And frankly leave us Human Elves,
To cut and fhuffle for our felves:
To ftand or walk, to rife or tumble,
As Matter, and as Motion jumble.
The Poets now, and Painters hold
This Thefis both abfurd and bold :
And your good-natur'd Gods, They fay,
Defcend some twice or thrice a-day:
Elfe all these Things We toil fo hard in,
Would not avail one fingle Farthing:
For when the Hero We rehearse,
To grace His Actions, and Our Verfe;
'Tis not by dint of Human Thought,
That to his LATIUM He is brought
IRIS defcends by FATE's Commands,
To guide his Steps thro' Foreign Lands:
And AMPHITRITE clears his Way
From Rocks and Quick-fands in the Sea.
And if You see Him in a Sketch;
(Tho' drawn by PAULO or CARACHE)
He shows not half his Force and Strength,
Strutting in Armour, and at Length:
That He may make his proper Figure,
The Piece muft yet be four Yards bigger:
The NYMPHS conduct Him to the Field:
One holds his Sword, and One his Shield:
MARS ftanding by afferts his Quarrel:
And FAME flies after with a Lawrel.

Thefe

These Points, I fay, of Speculation

(As 'twere to fave or fink the Nation)
Men idly learned will dispute,
Affert, object, confirm, refute:
Each mighty angry, mighty right,
With equal Arms sustains the Fight;
'Till now no Umpire can agree 'em:
So both draw off, and fing Te Deum,
Is it in Equilibrio,

If Deities defcend or no?

Then let th' Affirmative prevail,
As requifite to form my Tale:

-For by all Parties 'tis confeft,
That thofe Opinions are the best,
-Which in their Nature most conduce
To prefent Ends, and private Use.

Two Gods came therefore from above,
One MERCURY, the t' other JoVE:
The Humour was (it seems) to know,
If all the Favours They bestow,

Could from our own Perverseness eafe Us;
And if our Wish injoy'd would please Us.
Difcourfing largely on this Theme,
O'r Hills and Dales Their Godfhips came;
'Till well nigh tir'd at almoft Night,
They thought in proper to alight.

Note here, that it as true as odd is,
That in Disguise a God or Goddess
Exerts no fupernatʼral Powers;
But acts on Maxims much like Ours.

They fpy'd at laft a Country Farm,
Where all was fnug, and clean, and warm;

For