When the Queen frown'd or smil'd, and he knows. what

A fubtle Statesman may gather of that;

He knows who loves whom; and who by poison

Hafts to an Offices reverfion;

Who wastes in meat, in clothes, in horse, he notes,

He knows who hath fold his land, and now doth beg

A licence, old iron, boots, fhoes, and egge

Shells to tranfport;

NOTES.

VER. 145. Why Turnpikes] In this recapitulation of modern abufes, he has imitated his original with great spirit. Amongst those which Dr. Donne mentions is

A Licence, old iron, boots, shoes, and egge-
Shells to tranfport.

In

by this he means Monopolies, the most unpopular abuse of power of his time. It continued down thro' the reigns of Elizabeth, James, and Charles I. to the breaking out of the civil war. the year 1633 the four bodies of the Law entertained the Court with a magnificent Mask. And one of their Anti-masks was an ingenious ridicule on the abuse of Monopolies; which Mr. Whitlock thus defcribes: "In this Anti-mafque of Projectors (fays he) came a Fellow with a bunch of Carrots on his head, and a

When the Queen frown'd, or fmil'd, he knows; and

what

135

A fubtle Minister may make of that:
Who fins with whom: who got his Penfion rug,
Or quicken'd a Reverfion by a drug:
Whose place is quarter'd out, three parts in four,
And whether to a Bishop, or a Whore:
Who having loft his credit, pawn'd his rent,
Is therefore fit to have a Government:
Who in the fecret, deals in Stocks fecure,

140

And cheats th' unknowing Widow and the Poor :

Who makes a Truft or Charity a Job,

And gets an Act of Parliament to rob:

Why Turnpikes rife, and now no Cit nor clown Can gratis see the country, or the town:

NOTES.

145

"Capon upon his fift, describing a Projector who begg'd a pa"tent of Monopoly as the first inventer of the art to feed Ca66 pons fat with Carrots, and that none but himself might make "use of that invention, etc. Several other projectors were in "like manner perfonated in this Anti mafque; and it pleased "the spectators the more, because by it an information was "covertly given to the king of the unfitness and ridiculousness "of thefe projects against the Law; and the Attorney Noy, "who had moft knowledge of them, had a great hand in this "Anti mafque of the Projectors." This exorbitancy was become fo common and fashionable, that Ben Johnson makes a cheating Procurer of Monopolies the chief character in one of his plays; just as he had done a cheating Alchymist in another.

shortly boys shall not play

At fpan-counter, or blow-point, but shall pay
Toll to fome Courtier; and wifer than all us,
He knows what Lady is not painted. Thus
He with home meats cloyes me. I belch, fpue, fpit,
Look pale and fickly, like a Patient, yet
He thrufts on more, and as he had undertook,
To fay Gallo-Belgicus without book,

Speaks of all States and deeds that have been fince
The Spaniards came to th' lofs of Amyens.
Like a big wife, at fight of loathed meat,
Ready to travail: fo I figh, and fweat

To hear this Makaron talk: in vain, for yet,
Either my humour, or his own to fit,
He like a priveledg'd spie, whom nothing can
Difcredit, libels now 'gainst each great man.
He names the price of ev'ry office paid;
He faith our wars thrive ill because delaid ;

NOTES.

* Whom we call an Afs, the Italians ftyle Maccheroni. VER. 151. What Lady's face etc.] The Original is here very humourous. This torrent of fcandal concludes thus, And wifer than all us

He knows what Lady

the reader expects it will conclude,

No, just the contrary,

what Lady is not painted,

what Lady is painted.

fatirically infinuating, that that is a better Proof of the goodness

Shortly no lad shall chuck, or lady vole,
But fome excifing Courtier will have toll.
He tells what ftrumpet places fells for life,
What 'Squire his lands, what citizen his wife:
And last (which proves him wiser still than all)
What Lady's face is not a whited wall.

151

As one of Woodward's patients, fick, and fore, I puke, I nauseate,—yet he thrusts in more: Trim's Europe's balance, tops the statesman's part, And talks Gazettes and Post-boys o'er by heart. Like a big wife at fight of loathsome meat Ready to caft, I yawn, I figh, and fweat. Then as a licens'd fpy, whom nothing can Silence or hurt, he libels the great Man; Swears ev'ry place entail'd for years to come, 160 In fure fucceffion to the day of doom:

He names the price for ev'ry office paid,

And says our wars thrive ill, because delay'd:

NOTES.

of his intelligence than the other. The Reader fees there is greater force in the use of these plain words, than in those which the Imitator employs. And the reason is, because the fatire does not turn upon the odioufnefs of painting; in which cafe the terms of a painted wall had given force to the expreffion; but upon the frequency of it, which required only the fimple mention of the thing.

VER. 152. As one of Woodward's patients,] Alluding to the effects of his ufe of oils in bilious disorders.

That Offices are intail'd, and that there are
Perpetuities of them, lafting as far
As the last day; and that great Officers
Do with the Spaniards fhare, and Dunkirkers.
I more amaz'd than Circes prifoners, when
They felt themselves turn beafts, felt myself then
Becoming Traytor, and methought I saw

his jaw,

One of our Giant Statutes ope
To fuck me in for hearing him: I found
That as burnt venemous Leachers do
grow found
By giving others their fores, I might grow
Guilty, and he free: Therefore I did show
All figns of loathing; but fince I am in,
I must pay mine, and my forefathers fin
To the last farthing. Therefore to my power
Toughly and ftubbornly I bear; but th' hower
Of

mercy now was come: he tries to bring Me to pay a fine to 'fcape a torturing,

And fays, Sir, can you fpare me? I said, Willingly;
Nay, Sir, can you spare me a crown? Thankfully I
Gave it, as ranfom; but as fidlers, ftill,

Though they be paid to be gone, yet needs will
Thrust one more jigg upon you: fo did he
With his long complimental thanks vex me.

NOTES.

VER. 167. fall endlong] The fudden effect of the transformation is strongly and finely painted to the imagination, not in