me with power-"He that looketh upon a woman and lusteth after her, hath already committed adultery in his heart." I was constrained to believe it, and say, Lord, I am the man." I now saw in my heart what, if any man had told me before, I should not have believed; but I was forced to now, because I saw it. I had temptation upon temptation, and I found my heart inclining to all manner of evil; I found in my heart all manner of thefts, uncleanness, fornication, murder, adultery, pride, abominable cursings, with every other evil, this Scripture following me, "I will laugh at their calamity, and mock when their fear cometh." I now no longer despised my drunken neighbours, for I tried to drown these convictions by drinking myself; but always was obliged to make haste out of the house, lest it should fall

upon me.

I now left the coal-yard because I was obliged to serve on Sunday mornings. I thought that might be better; but this was a poor cure for a wounded spirit, for I sank deeper and deeper with all manner of evil thoughts, horrid blasphemous oaths against the Almighty in my mouth; so that at times I have not known whether I have spoken them or not for some minutes, the devil telling me I had done it in my heart, so that I might as well have spoken it; and the most awful conceptions of Christ, with all manner of beastly and brutish thoughts and evil communications that can be imagined. I now tried to keep my mind from evil for one day-this I failed in; then for an hour; from this to minutes; then, till I had set five stitches in my shoe; but failed in all this, the devil pursuing me with the temptation of suicide. I have been driven to that state of distraction that I have started from my seat and run up-stairs, fully determined to put an end to my existence-loosened my shirt-collar, with a razor in my hand; but just as I have been about to commit the rash act, I have felt a hand against my breast with as much power as if it had been the hand of a man, my arm dropping, and I had not the power of raising it again. But what have been my feelings after such temptations as these? I have stood motionless; not knowing whether I dared look up to heaven or not; but God the Holy Ghost still holding up Jesus as able to save, I have ventured on my knees, not daring to look up, but only saying, “Lord, save or I perish;" and fearing the devil would drag me away, soul and body; and have really thought he stood behind to catch hold of me as soon as I got from my knees. words followed me closely, "The prayers of the wicked are an abomination to God." Then these words, 66 1 pray not for these alone, but for all them that believe in me through thy word." Then I thought I would believe, but thought again I was not elected, so could not believe, therefore I must be lost; so that I was first driven one way and then dashed another. At last I concluded I should run mad, into some wood or forest, and no man would be able to come near me, and could not go to prayer for months without first begging the Lord not to strike me dead on my knees; and at night, when in bed, as long as I could keep my eyes open, that he would not destroy me before morning; then sleep a little, and wake again with the horrors of the damned -strike a light, and get the Bible-read Job and the Psalms-could see my character described; but unbelief and Satan beat me off, by saying there was a great difference between me and those good men. I thought all the ministers I heard were deceivers, because they gave hope for such characters as me; and being deceived I feared more than anything.

These

At last I heard that a man of the name of Parsons preached in a garret: I was immediately convinced that you, my father, were a man of God, and would be sure to condemn me; yet I wanted to hear you, and promised the person I would come and hear you the next Sunday evening, but broke my promise through fear; so I kept promising and breaking them every time Sunday came, till one Sunday my wife was so hard upon me that I could not escape

any longer; I now went into our front room-here I could see the hills; "Ah," thought I, "those hills will be removed out of their place at the day of judgment, and nothing to hide me from the all-seeing eye of God." I wished I had been a dog, a pig, or anything but a man. My wife now came in, saying, "Come, let us go and hear Mr. Parsons to-night; you know you have promised many times." "Ah," thought I, "if you were going to be condemned as I am, you would not be so willing to go;" however, I went with her as surly as a brute, not speaking to her all the way, though she did to me, but I thought if she knew my case, she would not wish to hear my condemnation; indeed, it was like dragging a man to be hanged. When we came to the house, I began to linger behind and became sullen, my wife pushing me in first. The garret was now full, so we were obliged to stand on the stairs; the first person I saw on the landing-place was a man that knew me from childhood, and knew most of my desperate race, and to this man I owed from forty to fifty shillings: the devil now worked amain with his temptations; I now thought this man's eyes were fixed upon me, and thought of what I owed him, so that he could not hear; besides, he knew my awful character, and would give the hint to all the rest, and they all would be in a confusion, for I thought my sin appeared so plain to every one, that I struck a terror wherever I went; but this man, whom I believe to be a vessel of mercy, when the Lord made me manifest to him, frankly forgave me the whole debt. But to return, I fain would have got out, but the people that came in after me blocked up the way, some of whom I could have knocked down-stairs, so did the devil rage in me; but as I could not get out, I thought I would hear what the man said, for as yet I did not know you, neither could I see you, as I could not get up-stairs. Your sermon was now begun, but the text was this-" Him that stumbleth is girded with strength;"at least, this was all I heard of the text. I now fully expected to hear my condemnation, but to my surprise you described my very state, how I stumbled at my manifold sins, my actual sins, my heart sins, my falling in Adam; how I stumbled at God's electing love, God's hearing my prayers, Christ's willingness and power to save, and how I strove to save myself; and indeed I did stumble and fall till I almost lost my soul, but the ever-blessed Jesus held me in the hollow of his hand, and held the wind of temptation in his fist. You now began to describe how such poor souls should be girded with strength, and how they were held up. Here the blessed Spirit shone upon the word, and enlightened my dark understanding in some measure; here I saw who stopt the flames of hell from swallowing me up; and I believed it was the Lord Jesus Christ that stopt me from destroying my wife, my children, and then myself; how it was the Lord had kept me from going mad; how it was the Lord had kept me when wandering on the roads in a dark night; how he had kept me from committing many dreadful sins when temptations have almost driven me out of my mind; how he kept me calling upon him as I walked the streets, the roads, sitting at work, on my knees and at night, on my bed, as long as I could keep my eyes open; this began to fill my heart with love to Jesus and to you. First, I thought, "What the Lord Jesus Christ upheld me, and caused me to look up with a little hope that he should not destroy me-him that I wished I could have plucked from his throne-him that I mocked, scorned, and derided ?" Now, I wished I could see you, for I now loved you from my very heart, though I did not know you. Here the blessed Jesus gave me a hope in his mercy, which hope I never have finally let go, but should have let all go many times had not the Lord held me

up.

(To be continued.)

TRIUMPHING IN JESUS.

DEAR FRIEND,

Grace, mercy, and peace be with you; love be multiplied unto you from our most merciful, loving, gracious covenant God and Father, and our loving beloved God and Saviour Jesus Christ, and our loving Comforter, the helpful Spirit of all grace, Israel's God and Lord, to whom be everlasting thanks and praises. Amen.

Not that we loved God. No, no! Oh, dread thought and recollection of enmity to God: but now slain, and all to the praise and glory of his sovereign free grace. Bless God, praise God, "we love him because he first loved us; and with loving-kindness hath drawn us, being in Christ, and in him reconciled us to himself." "This is our God for ever and ever; we have waited for him; he will be our guide, even unto death." And I humbly desire to be kept looking for the glorious appearing of the great God our Saviour. Bless him! yea, bless him! He is at this moment my soul's delight, feeling a sense of his loving favour and kind embrace; and my soul receives him as my All in all. This is my heaven on earth, the present enjoyment of his comforting presence and blessing. Indeed it is a goodly sight for the eyes to behold the Son, and feel his genial comforting rays of divine light, warmth, and glorious grace. O! the beauty and blessedness of this, contrasted with the darkness and death of our old Adam nature by the fall. O, bless the Lord for the light and immortality which is brought to light by the Gospel! Salvation is a joyful sound to us who so often feel the effects of our woful fall, and we at times are humbled under a feeling sense of what we now are in, and of ourselves as fallen creatures. "Poor and wretched, miserable, blind, and naked." Black yet comely, made rich in Christ, comely with the comeliness put upon us in him, and at times made sensibly happy in him; with our eyes anointed to see him by the eye of faith, and clothed in his righteousness, and sweetly enjoying his heavenly smiles, and the sweet kisses of his lips which are better than wine. Oh, my friend! hear his blessed voice in his word, "Thou art all fair, my love, there is no spot in thee." "O my beloved is mine, and I am his. My Lord, my God, my eternal all." Oh, my once suffering, but now triumphantly exalted Lord, in glory everlasting! I should rejoice to hear that he comforts you as at this moment he comforts me; and I am not worthy of the least of all the mercy and truth he hath so kindly showed unto me. But it was greatly needed; I felt so low, empty of good, dark, and helpless, before I sat down to write to you, though I often felt a wish for it to be otherwise; but now, having an opportunity, I looked unto the Lord, and thus he has graciously helped me on; and I am kept mentioning every day your name and family.

The following Scriptures pressed me to travel in the face of many difficulties, yet not without hope of mercy-viz. "My presence shall

go with thee, and I will give thee rest; for the Lord thy God is with thee whithersoever thou goest." My prayer was, "If thy presence go not with me, carry me not up hence." And O! bless our good Lord, he is gracious and faithful; and I now praise him for all that is past, and humbly trust him for all that is to come.

Gratefully yours, in the best of bonds,

Manchester, June 4th, 1840.

W. M.

DEAR SIR,

To the Editor of the Gospel Magazine.

Right glad am I to see that we are now privileged with a Magazine thus boldly launched forth on the sea of publication of divine truth, (knowing that "the vessel is insured in heaven, and God will make it good") having for its commander the Great Captain of Salvation, and for its under-captain or steersman, you, dear sir, as Editor. May the Lord command the refreshing gales of his Holy Spirit to comfort and refresh your soul, and the souls of those who may send communications to be inserted therein; and which shall waft this vessel along, amidst all the opposition of the professing world, in a day like this, when so much abounds.

In the present day of amalgamation of the church with the world, we really see a periodical that fully publishes in its pages the glorious doctrines of free and distinguishing grace, emanating in the Father's love, secured by the Son's suretyship engagements, and applied and ministered by the power of the Holy Ghost; but when we do (as I am sure we do in the present one), surely every real Christian should endeavour to promote its sale.

;

Allow me to say, that one thing in the publishing of this Magazine, of which I so much approve, is its Catholic spirit, which so much corresponds with the texts inserted at the commencement of the Numbers because, how can we, with a clear conscience say, that we "endeavour to keep the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace," if we exclude communications from any whom we cannot but believe are the Lord's, though differing from us in non-essentials?—because I think that when we see the likeness of Christ in others, it surely gives but shallow proof of that likeness being in us, if we correspond not with them.

May the Lord be always with you in the arduous and responsible work in which you are engaged, so that you may say with the Psalmist, "Because He is on my right hand I shall not be moved.'

August 14, 1840.

I remain,
Dear Sir,

Yours sincerely in Him,

W. J. A.

DEAR SIRS,

To the Editors of the Gospel Magazine.

Permit me to join in the congratulations of your correspondents, that the GOSPEL MAGAZINE is rescued from the hands of those who have proved themselves so ill-qualified for carrying out the holy purposes of the illustrious divines who were its originators.

That the principal vehicle for the dissemination of the doctrines of divine grace, during the greater part of a century, should, of late, have sunk so low in doctrinal statement, and exhibited so bigoted a partyspirit, has been a source of sorrow to very many of the household of faith. Gratitude to the God of all grace, in some measure commensurate with past disappointment and grief, is exemplified in several recent communications; and I cannot doubt that a goodly multitude of the Lord's people are exulting in the auspicious change, in unison with the writers in your July and August Numbers.

My present aim is to offer a tribute of approbation, and, if allowed, to add, now and then, a mite to your treasury, by way of incentive to the minds of my brethren in the faith which is in Christ Jesus.

When, in consequence of the wickedness and degeneracy of the people of God, the ark of the covenant was taken possession of by the enemy, such was the spiritual distress and destitution of the worshippers of the Lord God of Israel, that it extorted the fearful exclamation, "The glory is departed from Israel!" And when by the hands of the uncircumcised, it was conveyed to Ashdod and placed in the temple of Dagon, the result of the temporary triumph was the destruction of all the pomp and circumstance of their false worship. Besides effecting the total demolition of their idol, it is recorded that "the hand of the Lord was heavy upon them of Ashdod." And being glad to rid themselves of that depository of all that was sacred, they cried, "The ark of the God of Israel shall not abide with us, for his hand is sore upon us, and upon Dagon our God."

وو

Our ark was for a time removed from us. Was it in consequence of the degeneracy of the Lord's people? This we know, that spiritual Israel of the present day has indeed mourned the loss she sustainedIchabod being inscribed on all attempts made at imitation of our heretofore inestimable treasury of truth. Now it is our happiness to believe that it is safely lodged in the house of Obed-edom. May the Lord bless the house of Obed-edom, and all that he hath!

Whatever may have been the cause of the unseemly haste with which the sacred burden has been returned—and it becomes not us to inquire —we will rejoice and be glad, and praise the name of the Lord. Moreover, we are also desirous to strengthen each other's hands-the Editors', the Correspondents', and the Readers'-looking to Him, the Ark of the Covenant, that he will communicate by the Spirit of all grace such knowledge of his will, and such acquaintance with his truth, as shall prove, to the discomfiture of all enemies, that the GOSPEL of Christ alone is the store whence this MAGAZINE is supplied.