of that time called, with some reason, the thread of his discourse. One day, a client of his had a mind to see how he would acquit himself without it, and stole it from him. The consequence was, that the orator became silent in the midst of his harangue, and the client suffered for his waggery, by the loss of his

cause.

PARLIAMENTARY LITERATURE.

In prefacing a motion for the printing of a tax bill, a practice which, though not long adopted, has been of infinite service in preventing the blunders which formerly occurred, Mr. Sheridan proceeded to illustrate the style of a bill to remedy the defects of some bills already in being, by comparing it to the plan of a simple, but very ingenious, moral tale, that had often afforded him amusement in his early days, under the title of "The House that Jack Built." "First then comes in a bill, imposing a tax; and then comes in a bill to amend that bill for imposing a tax; and then comes in a bill to explain the bill that amended the bill; next, a bill to remedy the defects of a bill, for explaining the bill that amended the bill; and so on ad infinitum." After parodying the story in this way to a still greater length, Mr. Sheridan entered upon a comparison of tax bills, to a ship built in a dock-yard, which was found to be defective every voyage, and consequently was obliged to undergo a new repair; first, it was to be caulked, then to be new planked, then to be new ribbed, then again to be covered; and after all these expensive

alterations, the vessel was generally obliged to be broken up and rebuilt.

The orator next pointed out several absurdities in the tax bills which had been recently passed, and which he contended might have been avoided, if the bills, by being printed, had undergone a full and public discussion. "In the horse-tax bill, for instance, there was a clause which required a stamp to be placed, not indeed on the animal, but on some part of the accoutrements. The clause, however, on a little consideration, was abandoned; but another was inserted, so absurd, that it never was carried into execution; namely, the one by which it was enacted, that the numbers and names of all the horses in each parish should be affixed on the church door. The church wardens were also required, by the same act, to return lists of the windows, within their districts, to the commissioners of stamps, for the purpose of detecting those who had not entered their horses." ." "Now," said Mr. Sheridan, "if horses were in the habit of looking out at windows, this might possibly have been a wise and judicious regulation; but under present circumstances, there is some little occasion for wonder, how such ideas came to be associated in the minds of those who framed the bill, unless it was that they wished to sink the business of legislation into utter contempt."

.

DOCTOR SHAW.

"Catesby, go you with speed to Doctor Shaw,
And thence to Friar Beaker---bid them forth
Attend me here within an hour at farthest."

RICHARD THE THIRD.

Stow relates, that while Richard III. was Protector, it was desired, by that crafty prince and his counsel, that the famous, or rather infamous, Doctor Shaw, should in a sermon, at Paul's Cross, from a text on the dangers of illegitimate succession, signify to the people, that neither King Edward, nor the Duke of Clarence, nor the children of the Duke of York, were lawfully begotten, and that the Protector should come in at this period of the discourse, as if by accident, when the doctor was to proceed in these words: "But see the Lord Protector, that very noble prince, the special pattern of knightly prowess, as well in all princely behaviour, as in the lineaments and favour in his visage, representing the very face of the noble duke his father: this is the father's own figure; this his own countenance; the very print of his visage; the very sure undoubted image, the plain express likeness of the noble duke." It fell out, however, that through over-much haste, the doctor had spoken all this before the Protector came in; yet, beholding him enter, he suddenly stopped in what he was saying, and began to repeat his lesson again : "But see the Lord Protector, that very noble prince," and so on. "But the people," says Speed, 66 were so far from crying 'King Richard!' that they stood as if they had been turned into stones, for this very shameful sermon."

Shaw is said to have suffered severely for this vile profanation of his sacred calling. His conduct was so universally execrated, that he durst not go abroad; he kept out of sight like an owl; and ere long, died of shame and remorse.

WAY TO PROMOTION.

Speed relates, that Guymond, chaplain to King Henry the First, observing that for the most part ignorant men were advanced to the best dignities in the church, as he celebrated divine service before the king, and was about to read these words out of St. James, "It rained not upon the earth iii years and vi months," he read it thus: "It rained not upon the earth one---one---one years, and five---one months." Henry noticed the singularity, and afterwards took occasion to blame the chaplain for it. "Sir," answered Guymond, "I did it on purpose; for such readers I find are sooner preferred by your majesty." The king smiled, and in a short time afterwards presented Guymond to the benefice of St. Frideswid's in Oxford.

PIRATE'S DEFENCE.

Alexander the Great was about to pass sentence of death on a noted pirate, but previously asked him, Why dost thou trouble the seas?" " Why," rejoined the rover boldly, "dost thou trouble the whole world? I with one ship go in quest of solitary adventures, and am therefore called pirate; thou with a great army warrest against nations, and therefore art called emperor. Sir, there is no difference betwixt us but

in the name and means of doing mischief." Alexander, so far from being displeased with the freedom of the culprit, was so imprest with the force of his appeal, that he dismissed him unpunished.

BOLD APPEAL.

A poor old woman had often in vain attempted to obtain the ear of Philip of Macedon, to certain wrongs of which she complained. The king at last abruptly told her, "he was not at leisure to hear her." "No!" exclaimed she; "then you are not at leisure to be king." Philip was confounded; he pondered a moment in silence over her words; then desired her to proceed with her case; and ever after made it a rule to listen attentively to the applications of all who addressed him.

THE ORATOR AND THE TYRANT.

The report of the miserable state of slavery into which the Agrigentines had fallen under the tyrant Phalaris, so affected Zeno Eleates, that he resolved to leave his native country, and make a journey to Agrigentum, in order to try whether he could not by his counsels effect some amelioration in its condition. The philosopher made his first overtures to Phalaris himself; but finding the ear of the despot deaf to all wholesome counsel, he turned his attention to the patrician youth, whom he endeavoured by every effort to animate with a love of liberty, and a determination to free their country from bondage. Phalaris, being informed of the proceedings of Zeno, ordered