By nerves about our palate plac'd,
She likewife judges of the taste.
Elfe (difmal thought!) our warlike men
Might drink thick Port for fine Champagne;
And our ill-judging wives and daughters
Miftake small beer for Citron waters.
Hence too, that she might better hear,
She fets a drum at either ear;
And loud or gentle, harsh or sweet,
Are but th' Alarums which they beat.
Laft to enjoy her fenfe of feeling
(A thing fhe much delights to deal in)
A thousand little nerves fhe fends
Quite to our toes, and fingers' ends;
And these in gratitude again
Return their spirits to the brain;
In which their figure being printed
(As juft before, I think, I hinted)
Alma inform'd can try the cafe,
As she had been upon the place.
Thus, while the judge gives diff'rent journeys To country counsel, and attornies;
He on the bench in quiet fits,
Deciding, as they bring the writs.
The Pope thus prays and fleeps at Rome,
And very feldom ftirs from home;
Yet fending forth his holy spies,
And having heard what they advise,
He rules the church's bleft dominions,
And fets men's faith by his opinions.
The scholars of the Stagyrite,
Who for the old opinion fight,
Would make their modern friends confefs,
The diff'rence but from more to less.
The Mind, fay they, while you
To hold her station in the brain;
You grant, at least, she is extended:
Ergo the whole difpute is ended.
For 'till to-morrow fhou'd you plead
From form and ftructure of the head;
The Mind as visibly is feen
Extended thro' the whole Machine.
Why fhou'd all honour then be ta'en
From lower parts to load the brain :
When other limbs we plainly fee,
Each in his way, as brisk as he?
For mufic, grant the head receives it;
It is the artift's hand that gives it.
And tho' the fcull may wear the laurel;
The foldier's arm sustains the quarrel.
Befides, the noftrils, ears, and eyes
Are not his parts, but his allies.
Ev'n what you hear the tongue proclaim,
Comes ab origine from them.
What could the head perform alone,
If all their friendly aids were gone?
A foolish figure he must make;
Do nothing else, but sleep and ake.
Nor matters it, that you can fhow,
How to the head the spirits go.
Those spirits started from some goal,
Before they thro' the veins cou'd roll.
Now we should hold them much to blame,
If they went back, before they came.
If therefore, as we must fuppofe, They came from fingers, and from toes; Or toes, or fingers, in this case,
Of Num-scull's self shou'd take the place.
Difputing fair, you grant thus much,
That all fenfation is but touch.
Dip but your toes into cold water,
Their correfpondent teeth will chatter:
And strike the bottom of your feet;
You fet your head into a heat.
The bully beat, and happy lover
Confefs, that feeling lies all over.
Note here, Lucretius dares to teach
(As all our youth may learn from Creech)
That eyes were made, but could not view;
Nor hands embrace, nor feet pursue:
But heedlefs nature did produce
The members first, and then the use.
What each must act, was yet unknown,
'Till all is mov'd by chance alone.
A man first builds a country seat;
Then finds the walls not good to eat.
Another plants, and won'dring fees
Nor books, nor medals on his trees.
Yet poet and philofopher
Was he, who durft such whims aver.
Bleft, for his fake, be human reason,
That came at all, tho' late, in season.
But no man fure e'er left his house,
And faddl'd Ball, with thoughts fo wild,
To bring a midwife to his spouse,
Before he knew she was with child.
And no man ever reapt his corn,
Or from the oven drew his bread,
Ere hinds and bakers yet were born,
That taught them both to fow and knead.
Before they're ask'd, can maids refuse?
-pray, says Dick, hold in your muse,
While you Pindaric truths rehearse;
She hobbles in Alternate verfe.
Verfe? Mat. reply'd: is that my care?
Go on, quoth Richard, foft and fair.
This looks, friend Dick, as nature had
But exercis'd the Salefman's trade:
As if she haply had fat down,
And cut out cloaths for all the town:
Then fent them out to Monmouth street,
To try, what persons they would fit.
But ev'ry free and licenc'd taylor
Would in this Thefis find a failure.
Should whims like these his head perplex,
How could he work for either fex?
His cloaths, as atomes might prevail,
Might fit a pifmire, or a whale.
No, no: he views with ftudious pleasure
Your shape, before he takes your measure.
For real Kate he made the bodice,
And not for an Ideal goddess.
No error near his shop-board lurk'd:
He knew the folks for whom he work'd.
Still to their size he aim'd his skill:
Elfe, pr'ythee, who would pay his bill?
Next, Dick, if chance herself shou'd vary;
Obferve, how matters would mifcarry:
Across your eyes, friend, place your shoes;
Your fpectacles upon your toes;
Then you and Memmius shall agree,
How nicely men would walk, or fee.
But wisdom, peevish and cross-grain'd,
Must be oppos'd, to be sustain'd.
And fill your knowledge will increase,
As you make other people's lefs.
In arms and fcience 'tis the fame :
Our rivals hurts create our fame.
At Faubert's if disputes arise
Among the champions for the prize;
To prove, who gave the fairer butt,
John fhews the chalk on Robert's coat.
So, for the honour of your book,
It tells, where other folks miftook:
And, as their notions you confound,
Those you invent get farther ground.
The commentators on old Ari-
fotle ('tis urg'd) in judgment vary:
They to their own conceits have brought
The image of his general thought.
Juft as the melancholic eye
Sees fleets and armies in the sky;
And to the poor apprentice ear
The bells found Whittington Lord May❜r.
The conj'rer thus explains his scheme :
Thus fpirits walk, and prophets dream;
North-Britons thus have Second fight;
And Germans free from gunshot fight.
Theodoret, and Origen,
And fifty other learned men
Atteft, that if their comments find
The traces of their master's mind;
Alma can ne'er decay nor die:
This flatly t'other fect deny,
Simplicius, Theophraft, Durand;
Great names, but hard in verse to stand.
They wonder men should have mistook
The Tenets of their master's book;
And hold, that Alma yields her breath,
O'ercome by age, and seiz'd by death.
VOL. II.
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